Heavy rain meant that no play was possible at Edgbaston
Mission accomplished so far. England have sealed the series and will face South Africa as world No1. AS for this match, yes, it's a dead rubber but with Jimmy Andeson rested we're likely to see Steve Finn for the first time in a Test this summer. Andrew Strauss says Anderson understands the policy: "We want to avoid a situation where players get burnt out - that's the last thing we want to do and that's where that rotation policy comes in," he said. "The idea of rotating and resting is that they end up playing more, not less. The last thing you want is for someone to be playing to the extent that they're dead on their feet and get injured and are out for months."
We're also likely to see Sunil Narine for West Indies fresh from scaring the bejesus out of batsmen in the IPL. He's that most terrifying of beasts – a mystery spinner – and as Smyth pointed out yesterday in The Spin even if he turns out to be another Mendis, who tails off dramatically once batsmen figure him out, he'll still be in that first, dangerous flush of youth when England face him in this Test. Besides, most people agree he is likely to be a threat for some time to come having as he does greater accuracy turn and bounce than Mendis.
Matt Prior has been passed fit. He had some kind of terrifying eye infection but a bit of a rub with sulphuric acid and a wire brush means he'll be OK to play – Steve Davies had been called up as a back-up but will return to play for Surrey against Sussex.
Weather update. I was in Birmingham last night and the rain drops were doing an impressive warm-up routine on my head. There may be a bit of play this morning judging from the weather forecast on the BBC but this afternoon isn't looking too promising:
Cloudy through the day with spells of rain during the morning, then a brief drier interlude around midday and early afternoon before more heavy rain returns from the south, along with strengthening southeasterly winds.
Nick Knight is having a look at the pitch. The covers are on and the clouds are bearing down on Edgbaston, and the start has been delayed. There's no standing water on the outfield but closer in there's a few muddy patches. On the positive side, Knight appears on telly without Kevin Pietersen taking a swing at him. Andy Flower pops up to and says the rigours of today's game means he needs to rest players such as Jimmy Anderson, just as Wayne Rooney doesn't play in every game for Manchester United. He says it's a policy that will continue too with his fast bowlers. Flower adds it will give others an opportunity to show their talent.
"I don't mind a bit of rotation, but it's surely disingenuous to claim that Jimmy Anderson would be 'dead on his feet' later in the season if he played this Test," says Gary Naylor. "If he plays in all England's other fixtures this month, he will bowl 44 overs maximum - in June." I'll let Andy Flower answer this one, Gary, because he's just talked about it on Sky. He says Jimmy is carrying a few niggles and if they "blew up" in this Test and he missed the rest of the summer, people would be up in arms that he was played in a dead rubber. Having said that, it sounds like Jimmy agreed with you, Gary.
Here's John Starbuck: "As it looks like you may be stuck for topics on a rain-infested day, here's a cocktail recipe:
The Transit of Venus
Two measures Amoretto
Two measures Tequila
One measure Appleton Rum
One measure Plymouth Gin
One measure Apple juice
One measure Cranberry juice
Shake violently and pour over dry ice or other steam-effect ingredient, with a slice of lemon.
Drink slowly.
The apple and amoretto ingredients are for Venus, the tequila is for the kick, the rum is because England are hosting West Indies and the gin is because you know what sailors are."
It looks like someone you overdid the dry ice effect and obscured Venus for the entire population of British astronomers. They'll have to wait 105 years for their next chance, so well done for ruining their lives. And for causing all the cloud that's put off the start of the Test.
Big debate on Sky about whether resting Jimmy is a good idea or not. Nasser Hussain points out that the likes of Matthew Hoggard, Darren Gough and Andrew Flintoff played their last Tests for England in their early 30s – and the stress on their bodies wasn't helped by the grind of Test cricket. I've got to say I'm in agreement with him – there's no point in playing Anderson in a dead rubber if leaving him out will prolong what has been an excellent career.
"So what if there's a bit of mizzle/drizzle/torrential downpour: the teams should be out there playing," says Tom Evershed. "There's no commitment nowadays. If the ball plugs into the pitch or no-one can see to take a catch, that's just part of the fun. If the bowlers slip and slide and constantly bowl beamers, that's just an extra challenge for both sides. If Kevin Pietersen is struck by lightning and perishes in a ball of hellfire while IJ Trott scratches impassively away at the other end, that just enables KP to cement his place in cricketing history despite the apparent squandering of his considerable talents."
Sky are showing a repeat of an interview with Kevin Pietersen from 2005. He spends half the interview licking his teaspoon and he also thinks he can make an impact for England. I give him two Tests. "There's no reason not to play in a bit of drizzle," says Tim Featherstone-Griffin. "I took my daughters to Uppark in the rain yesterday and it's clear that Abby - age 9 - could teach Johnny Bairstow a thing or two about handling the short ball, despite the conditions..." She's not even wearing a helmet!
Meanwhile, in Sri Lanka ... The hosts aren't doing too well: 48-5 off 17.2 overs at the time of writing. "Have you seen Gul's figures? Six overs 3 for 13. That must be some sticky wicket in Pakellele," sighs Adrian Neville.
"Morning Tom, morning everyone," chirps John Davies. "So is this the League Cup, then, suddenly? Why doesn't Andy Flower pick Michael Owen for this one?" Michael says he'd rather be 12th man and pick up his wages from the players' balcony.
"As we understand it, there is an allowance for one charity plug per day's play on the OBO. As such, can we make a pitch for ours?" asks Jamie Kirkaldy. Yes, yes, you can. "Two regular OBOists combine to make the world's least likely ironman pairing. It's three weeks to go and we're in full-on squeaky bum mode but our causes are good and we are nothing if not determined, as demonstrated in our Rocky-style training montage." You can donate here, or here. What's half an ironman? A copperman? A tinfoil man?
It's still tipping it down at Edgbaston and the covers are on so there won't be play anytime soon. As for half an ironman: "Iron's atomic number is 26 - 13 gives aluminium, so we'd have alumniuman," says Olly Winkles. Or Aloominum man if you're American. And possibly Canadian.
An early lunch will be taken at 12.30pm and there'll be an inspection after that. But the prospects for the rest of the day aren't good – there's more rain moving into the West Midlands this afternoon. If it's any consolation the forecast for Saturday is lovely. "There's a thing on Radio 4 at the moment about the music sport people use to get 'zoned' or motivated," says John Davies. "Apart from Clive Woodward biffing on about how much of a genius he was, it's quite interesting. Audley Harrison used to get stressed, so before he boxed, he played himself slow, calming, slightly atonal Japanese classical music. How much sense does that make? What an idiot. What do we think Trott listens to?" Audley boxed like he was dazed from all that atonal music too. As for Clive Woodward, I remember his Desert Island Discs being a tad Ronan Keating-orientated.
"Any chance that Bresilad could be dropped for Onions or Jimmy in order to keep the winning run going," pleads Ben Hall. "I'm wary that half a day lost through rain could mean The Run could end this match. And there's nothing more important in Test cricket at the moment than The Run." True, I am very concious of The Run. Well, we're off for lunch now but Smyth will be here for more weather news in a bit. You can email him at rob.smyth@guardian.co.uk.
Afternoon. Who wants some? Play, that is. Who wants some play? I fear those of you who do will be disappointed, as it's grim above the Watford Gap. Is Birmingham even above the Watford Gap? Whatever, you get the point. Expect play to be abandoned for the day at approximately 2.17pm.
If play is abandoned all spectators will get a refund. That was not the case during the first Test on this ground in 1992, when there was a uniquely cricketing farce. Here's the Wisden Almanack report:
When play did start on Friday the conditions counted for nothing. Gooch put Pakistan in, but only two deliveries were possible and three runs scored before the umpires offered the light. On Thursday, refunds were offered to 8,500 ticket-holders, but on Friday there was no compensation for 15,000, under the Test and County Cricket Board's rules, because there had been play - however brief. Angry supporters, who had paid up to £26, gathered outside the pavilion while officials were ushered out of a side door. The Board's offer to Friday's ticket-holders of free entry on the last day of a match already doomed did nothing to mollify the protesters. (Later in the year, a Small Claims Court said the Board had been unfair to people who could not have read the conditions on the tickets before they brought them.)
1.11pm "This is preposterous," says Matt Turland. "I intended to spend the better part of working day studying whether Finn has become more disciplined in his approach and discussing this with myself the OBO. Instead, I find myself having to write a Film Guide for my employer. Disgusting." Nothing sickens an Englishman as much as actually having to work to justify his salary.
1.14pm The 40-minute period that Bob Willis and nobody else in the entire known universe refers to as "the luncheon interval" has now ended, although – shock, horror – the covers are still on. There's no suggestion that we will see cricket any decade soon.
1.21pm "I feel no sympathy for Mr. Turland," says Nigel Green. "I, on the other hand, have wasted a perfectly good sickie." It's not too late to watch Loose Women on ITV+1.
1.30pm Here's our man Mike Selvey on Twitter. "Hate to be the bringer of bad tidings, but the filthy stuff has arrived, and stretches back a long way back to Cornwall." He's not talking about a fancy-dress conga. There's nothing to see here; play should be abandoned soon enough.
2pm Still nothing happening, so let's watch some highlights. Here's one of my all-time top five favourite spells of fast bowling: Shoaib Akhtar against Australia in 2002-03. The force was strong in that one. The yorker to Adam Gilchrist is unreal.
2.08pm "The amazing thing about that Wisden Almanack report is not that the TCCB refused to give refunds ... but the horrendous literal in the sentence in parentheses," says our old friend Alan Gardner. "'Brought them'! I hope someone got a good thrashing with a leather strap for that."
That report may be 20 years old, but to me the buck stops with the current Wisden editor. Do I think Booth should resign over this? That's not for me to say.
3pm No news is no news. It can't be long before they suspend play for the day.
3.14pm The forecast isn't much better for tomorrow, although weathermen of the world reckon a three-day Test could begin on Saturday.
3.32pm: THEY'VE DONE IT! The umpires have finally abandoned play for the day. Not much point us dancing this dance any longer, is there? See you tomorrow for more rainwatching. Bye!